Elizabeth's Zucchini Bake

My sweet little puppy girl, Ayla, turned 5 this week.  We still call her Kid.  I always marvel at all the names people have for their dogs, and I wish people came up with spontaneous and fitting nicknames to call me at times.  We started calling her The Kid when she was a puppy baby as my older dog Orso adjusted to her presence.  She seemed like such a child compared to his old manish ways that he had even when he was a puppy.   So she is Kid, Sweetheart, A, Lady Fluffington, and Baby Girl.  My husband mostly calls her Kid and she lights up when he says it.  She knows all of her names, of course.  For her birthday, I got her two balls, realizing I never even gave her the chance to decide if she liked to play ball since Orso did not.  I fetched the balls a bunch of times, but she was uninterested.  I did get her a nice bright pink Elephant that is her current favorite toy.  And she got some new bandanas which she now loves to wear since her Auntie Eunice got her some.  

Recipe

For the moment, this post will not contain the many cool photos I took of food along the way of this recipe.  I decided to work on my photography and got out the real camera, as opposed to the phone.  It went swimmingly, until I realized I can't remember where I put the cord that goes from camera to computer.  So while I work that out, I have to share the recipe because I know lots of you are up to your ears in zucchini and squash.

My sister-in-law, Elizabeth is in France for 3 weeks or so (jealous).  My mother-in-law is picking up her CSA and sharing it with me while they are gone.  So I had visions of making some sort of zucchini cakes, but as usual, things changed along the way.  But the end product was, I think, a very original interpretation of flavors with squash.

Ingredients

• 2 large zucchini and 1 large yellow squash or some amount of such things.  When grated, it completely filled the food processor bowl (is it a bowl - it has a handle?).  What you should do then, that I skipped out of forgetfulness and heat, is to salt and let the water drain out of the squash before you move on.  It came out fine without that, but trust me and just do it.
• 1/2 bunch of basil coarsely chopped (you need some for the sauce too)
• small red onion finely chopped (it had an extremely intense flavor for a little dude.  Use a larger one if it's not fresh out of the ground)
• 5-6 garlic cloves finely chopped (these were not from the CSA)
• 1/2 or more of romano or parm or other salty, nutty cheese.
• 1 C breadcrumbs - if your mixture appears to be still to wet, add a bit more
• 2 eggs
• Salt - if you salted to drain water, you may not need as much.  

Throw all that in a bowl, mix.  Pour into a 9X9 glass dish and add some extra bread crumbs if you want on top.  Bake at 350 until it does not appear to jiggle or be liquidy.  I think it was about 40 minutes, but I was hot and ran away from the kitchen.

Sauce
I went in what you might think is an odd direction for sauce.  You could go with a basic tomato sauce and that would work beautifully if you serve it hot.  I made more of a bright dressing for it because I was planning on eating it cold.

In blender or magic bullet

• 1/2 C vinegar of your choice (I used rice because it was all I had)
• 1/2 C olive oil
• 2-4 T of finely chopped basil 
• 1T dry mustard
• 1t garlic powder
• 1 T oregano (dried stuff)
• 1 T honey or more to taste
• salt

Blend until smooth - really let it run until the basil is fully integrated.

I ended up eating it both hot and cold with this sauce and a dollop of sour cream.  I am a person who thinks almost everything needs a dollop of sour cream, and I have been this way my whole life.  You may choose just the sauce.

Maybe when Elizabeth gets home I will make it for her.  But really, I will just want to hear about the food and markets in France.

Healing

My doctor gave me a lower dose of steroid than last time so the side effects were much gentler.  Still, I feel often just a touch out of sync with the world.  The world is just a little too far away and slow versus my inner experience.

For MS, I got new brain and neck MRIs this week so I spent a bunch of time reading them myself.  Brain MRIs are not my expertise but I think I got a handle on it.  It looks like where I used to have a few very small lesions, it is now one larger lesion.  It is in the area of the brain called the corpus callosum which is part of how the two hemispheres of your brain communicate with each other.  Lesions here are largely about cognitive deficits and memory loss (um, ya think?).  Other than that, I didn't see any new ones except for one questionable area in my neck.  If there was a lesion there, though, I would have some serious upper body deficits by now.

I actually had a thought today that my leg pain/spine issue was created as a great distraction from thinking about the unpredictability and intensity of MS.  I'm forever looking for reasons why I am suffering with leg pain - always convinced that the next realization will be the one that sets me free somehow.  It's the worse application of holistic thinking - "learn your lessons from this and you will be free of it" - which really means - "you are to blame for this."  And I can very easily get stuck there.

I notice how some of my friends have retreated about my surgeries and disabilities.  Some of my friends cannot cope with the concept of a illness that does not go away.  Maybe to, over the years of pain, I have had times of more function and times of less function.  They may wait for the time of good function to reengage.  I find I keep saying, "No, I can't drive there" or "I thought I would be well enough for the car ride there but I'm not."  I was reading recently about another healer who became ill and realized people-pleasing became an impossibility.  And she missed it.  And I do too - being the one to show up places, being fun and predictable.  When I committed a week in advance to doing something, I did it.  But now is about moment to moment thinking and living.  I don't know what I'm doing in the fall.  I don't know what I will be able to do tomorrow.  I'm not sure what kind of night sleep I will have.

I haven't even begun to complain about heat so I'll save that for my berry galette recipe which is what is next.

Today I spent a deep 2 hours in meditation and made a dream board of sorts.  It is a collage of images and words of my hope.  I want to share it with others, because maybe the simplicity of this idea of focused faith with a tangible result will help someone else.  It is so beautiful.  I love it.  I think it might be too tender to share just yet.  But I will after it's done cooking in my energy.

I am reminded of the first mediation I learned.  I repeated these four phrases in my mind with breathing. I was taught that you cannot offer these hopes for others until they are full within yourself.  These words are a humble prayer.

May I be filled with loving kindness.
May I be peaceful and at ease.
May I be healthy in body and in mind.
May I be happy.